The Blundering Tooth Fairy

About a month ago, my oldest excitedly announced his first loose tooth. Now to call his tooth loose is being pretty generous. Every 5 minutes for the first few days he asked me to check if it was looser than 5 minutes ago. This child is only excited about a tooth falling out, because he has heard that you get money for teeth that are no longer attached to a mouth. 

At first he felt that each tooth was worth $19. When I came back with 25 cents, we both agreed we could live with a buck a tooth. Don't you have like 20 teeth? Times 4 kids, I'm going to owe $80 for gross little baby teeth? What, no sleep as they were coming in and spending my life savings on baby Motrin wasn't enough??? Now I gotta pay for them to fall out?

Anyways, two weeks ago kid #2 came into my bedroom at 6am panicked because something was wrong with his tooth. Much to my surprise the thing was so wiggly I had no idea how it was still hanging on. Imagine #1's utter dismay to realize his little brother was going to lose a tooth before him. Now Kyler had already lost a tooth, but it had to be pulled at age 2 by a dentist with a large scary needle and a humorous amount of laughing gas, and had been awarded a Tootsie Pop by the tooth fairy so it didn't really count to big brother. 

Knowing Kyler I am very suspicious that this tooth's mobility could have been encouraged by face planting on the trampoline, or falling face first out of the top bunk, or sumo wrestling with brothers over the back of the couch. Last night the thing was hanging by a string, and as today was the last day of preschool it would be his last chance to show off his new gap, so he tried eating a bag of apples and nothing happened. Over the course of several hours he worked up the courage to let daddy take a pair of pliers to the dangling little chomper. 

At this point I will again point out my dear hubby's amazing handiness with garage tools when it comes to  our children's health care needs. You may remember the blog on the peanut that found itself lodged in the same child's nose a few years back, and when Kevin was threatened with an ER with 3 children by himself and the co-pay with it, he went into the garage and found a poking tool, extracting the little nut himself; no co-pay required. 

Kyler wiggles in bed more than anyone I know. Never once have I gone into his room to find his head nestled on the pillow, in fact a few times I have had to move the head that was hanging off the edge of the bed back onto solid mattress. Knowing this, the thought of a little tooth hiding unsuspectingly between sheets made me shudder, so we decided to let the tooth fairy know that the tooth would be waiting for her on the kitchen counter. The Tooth Fairy is very nice so she can roll with the punches! 

11pm I am finally drifting off to sleep after getting the baby with an ear infection calmed down yet again and my hacking husband with pneumonia has settled into a moaning slumber. Suddenly I realized there was a tooth awaiting a swap with a dollar sitting on my counter. I sit straight up in bed and shout, "oh no the tooth fairy!" My sick husband jolts awake, "Where??"

I go scrounging for a dollar. I don't have any, so I find 4 quarters and fumble my ways downstairs. I trade the tooth for the coins and then I am left holding this little gross thing that has lived its life in my son's mouth! What do I do with it? I stand barefoot in the middle of the kitchen in my pink pj's with the stove light on staring at this thing for 5 minutes. Finally I flick it into the trash can and go running back up stairs. My husband can't believe I threw it away. What am I supposed to do with it? He thinks we should have kept it in a baggie. Now I feel like a bad mom. Do people really keep those things??? What else do they keep?

I finally get back in bed, but then I hear what sounds like someone in my backyard and go investigate, because hubby is sick, and yes I did make him get up and run into the back yard wearing only underwear to rescue a plastic swimming pool at midnight once while it was snowing, but he didn't have pneumonia and a 102 fever then. (Our neighbors probably never go to bed, because they want to see what else those crazy Wilson's will do)There is no one in the backyard, but in getting up I wake up the baby again and my husband rouses, sending him into yet another 45 minute coughing fit. I saw almost every hour last night. Stinking tooth, I could have been asleep by 11......!

My Mom

Today I looked at my husband and said, "How the heck am I the mom of 4 kids?? I have become my mother!" And I am proud of it!

My mom taught me some very important lessons! She taught me that if your man is loading dishes in the dishwasher in the most ineffective way known to man, to never ever say anything. He'll never load it again!

She taught me that if your dishes come out with a few little pieces of food still stuck on, that is perfectly ok. Its clean food!

My mother taught me that if the dryer is making a horrible noise and seems to be walking across the laundry room, then your radio is not even near high enough!

She taught me that no matter how old your kid gets, you still lay awake at night worrying that they ate the right food, have the right friends, marry the right person and changed their underwear today.

I must admit that I made my mom's job every mother dream, no mom, not night mare, I said dream. I remember one day my sister and I were doing something we weren't supposed to. Hard to believe I know.  Anyway we were sentenced to the downstairs indefinitely. The downstairs had this window that was level to the ground. After a while, and I am sure this was my sister idea, we climbed out of the window and went to play. 

I remember once a neighbor boy walked me home. It was starting to get dark, and we stood outside talking. At one point I glanced up at my bedroom window directly above us and my mothers nose was squished rather disproportionately against the window, lips leaving smudges, as she tried to hear what we were talking about. 

I remember my mom taking me to get my ears pierced and 10 years later convincing her to do the same. I remember my mom reading to us for hours at a time. I remember sitting on the floor for inhumane amounts of time as my mom painstakingly braided my hair in little tiny braids so my hair would be wavy for church. I remember my mom prom dress shopping with me, and her tight lipped smiles when I headed out the door with my prom date. I remember my mom hugging me good bye at my wedding, trying not to cry. I remember my mom, tears streaming down her face as she held her first grandson for the first time, and even though he looked like something from a horror movie with his odd shaped purple bruised head, saying he was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen and she totally meant it!

I have called my mom sobbing. I have called my mom so excited I was breathless. I have called my mom with nothing really to talk about and hung up an hour later. I have called my mom asking, what do I do if my son eats THAT? Or what should I do if my kid is still in diapers in college? What should I do if I have baked the pie for 2 hours and its still runny? What should I use to get pee out of the carpet? What should I do if I am sick and my kids aren't? What should I do if my kid is covered in red spots?

Mom I am so proud to call you mom!! I love you more than I will ever be able to tell you and I hope I can be as good of a mother as you have been. Thank you!

And God Said.. STOP CLIMBING ON THAT!

I don't know about you, but right now my life is crazy busy. I have friends who go to several Bible Studies a week, I have friends who, every day post Bible verses as their facebook status that they came across when they were doing their three hour quiet time. I have friends who have read every single devotional and are that perfect Proverbs 31 woman. 

Don't get me wrong, I want to grow and be everything I can possibly be. I probably do need a huge dose of "Spirituality" in my every day life. I have a friend who put it so well; "I really try hard to make the Lord my number one priority, but lets face it, the Lord isn't asking me to change his poopy diaper RIGHT NOW."

I determined to read my Bible more. I tried doing it at night and the next morning I had drooled all over Adam naming the animals. So I decided I would try it in the morning, but the baby decided breakfast was more important than the "two by two's" making their way into the ark. I finally found a perfect time to read my Bible; while I am pumping. See I told you I need more spirituality in my daily routine!

Bedtime rolls around and I am determined to be that mom who prays with her kids and has kids who grow up to breathe and sleep and eat prayer and pray prayers that produce food for hungry kids and heals broken limbs instantly. My kids start their prayers, and in between hearing them thank God for Nintendo and asking Him for Luke Skywalker to become a real life person, I must have nodded off, because all of a sudden there is World War 3 going on over top of me because one kid prayed for the other kid to let him use his bicycle and for God to hit him over the head if he doesn't. 

You know that verse about praying without ceasing, I think I am doing better at that! "God please don't let that police officer catch up to me" "God please don't let my kid puke from eating the tube of toothpaste" "God please keep the bank open an extra 20 minutes today" "God please help me not to intentionally lose my fighting kids in the store." "God PLEASE let the bathroom scales be wrong!"

We read a Bible Story the other night and I was interrupted by one of my inquisitive sons; "Mommy what did Noah do with all that poop from the animals on the ark?" Before I could answer  another one asked, "Yeah and where did Noah go to the bathroom?" Which reminded the third kid that he had a poopy diaper, and poor Noah did not get off the boat full of stinky animals that night.

My kids and I do have spiritual discussions. We talk about if nothing is impossible for God than he can make slime come out of his ears. We talk about how big God's fingernail clippings must be if he can hold the whole world in his hands and we talk about how God has to whisper because if he talked out loud, since he's so big, it would pop all of our ears. 

Awhile back, I had a grouchy kid giving me attitude at lunch. I prayed for our food and added a plea for all of us to have good attitudes. Without missing a beat, my child chimed in "Dear God, don't listen to mommy. Amen" 

Last Sunday after church the Sunday School teacher mentioned that my kids were in time out for karate chopping each other over the head multiple times. Yep we are officially the most unspiritual family in church. 

Thankfully I have learned about God's grace and I realize that he understands if the only Bible Verse I read  that day is the one over my kitchen sink or if He has to listen to panicked pleas to keep the child forgotten at school scarred for a short time instead of for life, more than once a week. I think he understands that someday I do plan on joining the deep discussions on how in the world the Proverbs 31 woman ever has time to sleep instead of discussing whether or not dinosaurs will be in Heaven. 

Just Another Day in Paradise

I get a lot of comments about my 22 month old. "He's so cute!" "How do you ever tell him no?" "Look at those eyes" and they go on and on. Those people do not live with him on a regular basis. When I try to convince  them that the innocence is totally superficial, I get nasty looks! So today I followed little Mr. Caleb around with a camera. I did discover he does have pretty cute eyes.

Yesterday when I was picking up Kyler at school, we were standing in line. Before I could stop it, Caleb removed his shoe and hurled it into the lady in front of him. She whirled around with a rather annoyed look on her face and then looks at me and says, "He has the cutest smile I have ever seen." I'm looking at her thinking, "Lady, the kid left a shoe shaped bruise on your shin, remember??" 

Today is Friday; cleaning day. I locked Caleb in the backyard so the house could be clean for 10 minutes.  Well the 10 minutes ended, hurricane Caleb entered the house and I am still sitting in the middle of a ripped up book, with marshmallows scattered about and Kleenex from the freshly emptied box softly floating around my head.

Micah asked for Snickerdoodles. I decided this sounded fabulous so I set out to bake some really quick before supper. Of course Caleb was tired of turning the washing machine on and off and on and off and on and off and on and off, so he wandered over to watch what I was doing. I turned around to wash the flour off of my hands and this is what happened. 

He ate three balls of dough before I stopped him, and as I was filling a second pan I noticed a few more that had not escaped the fingers of Sir Caleb.

As I was finishing up with the cookies, Caleb, who was jumping on the couch, hit his head on the windowsill. Wails and tears and hiccups ensued and I set him up on the counter while I washed up the baking dishes. I stopped to get the phone but Caleb had no problem entertaining himself while I took my attention elsewhere for a few minutes. 

He scampered away as fast as he could as I cleaned up the pond on the kitchen floor, and yelled threats that Canada could hear. By this time I am well aware that even I do not understand the extent of this child's talent for sabotaging cleaning day, so I scurry upstairs to find him. And I almost just turned around and went back downstairs once I found him.

Do you know how hard it is to get pencil off of walls? There was pencil all over every wall in the hall way. Seriously the child has impressive destructive speed! He wanted the rag I was cleaning with and when I wouldn't let him have it, he threw himself on the floor in a wailing kicking fit. I didn't look at him once, so he got up and went into the bathroom declaring "rag". I finished cleaning the wall and realized he hadn't come back out of the bathroom. 

I have no idea how he got the facet handle off, or why both of his brothers toothbrushes are in his mouth. There was a cute little hand print on my freshly cleaned mirror. At this point supper was burned and Liam was screaming for his supper. The older two were fighting and I was ready to declare bedtime at 5:30pm!

After supper we all sat down to watch a movie. 10 minutes into it, this was sweet little Caleb.

And this is just 1 kid, I have 3 more where he came from!!!

March Memories

I hate March. It seems as though March is filled with teeny tastes of spring, and long blasts of winter. March makes me feel like winter will never end. I have never liked the month of March.

This March, however, was the month of visitors. To try and buddy up to me, March has also delivered several long stretches of beautiful 70 degree weather. I am warming up to the rascally month of March.

My baby brother from North Carolina graced us with his presence the last week of February and the first week of March. We had some grand adventures. I reminded him several times of all the diapers of his that I changed and I made him clean my couches until midnight one night. He ate an inhumane amount of food and left his socks on my bathroom floor. He took my kids snake shopping. I can't believe how much my baby brother has grown up! I can't wait till he comes back to visit!! Caleb just told someone that the guest bed was Uncle Ryan's bed, and he still asks for him on a regular basis.

Our next set of visitors was my cousins Marilyn and her little baby bump, and Cheryl and her princess Malana, from New Mexico.

When we were growing up we lived next to each other for two years. Those two years have so many memories!! We had a funeral for a guinea pig and baby chick, we played Indians dressed in paper bags in the backyard. We built elaborate forts from cardboard boxes.

While they were here, we watched our kids play and make memories like we did when we were their ages. We spent an afternoon learning how to ride bikes and climb rocks in Garden of the Gods, and spent time relaxing and chatting. Micah and Kyler were rather sad the day they had to say goodbye to their cousins. Kyler dramatically stated that he "loved Malana for always".

A few days after my cousin's left, my grandparents from Bellville Pennsylvania came to visit. We had some yummy bar-b-q and looked at pictures and caught up. This was actually the first time they got to meet crazy and wild Caleb, and of course they met little Liam as well. My kids love Grandpa and Grandma Peachey, and were thrilled with Grandpa's stories about "pet snakes" found when their Papa and Uncles were boys. My Grandma raised three boys and it was fun to hear about what all I have to look forward to!

My Uncle Tim from San Diego also came with my grandparents, but he and his wife Carolyn got to stop in again, for a day a week later. Uncle Tim and Aunt Carolyn came bringing cool gifts for the boys and were instantly welcomed with open arms by the boys. Everyone competed to sit by them at lunch and every latest achievement and story were told several times by my kids. We always have such a great time catching up with Uncle Tim and Aunt Carolyn, even though every time we see them we tend to have another new family member. Maybe we should Skype or email from now on. Kyler whined that it was no fun that they had to go home!

We love having company!! And there is still a week left in March if you are feeling left out!!

Random Wilson Moments

When I was a little girl I dreamed about meeting prince charming, marrying him, having a dozen kids and living happily ever after. I didn't, however, think about prince charming getting old! (I still refuse to believe that if he is getting old, then I am, because I was like 12 when I got married, so I still have years and years before it happens to me!)

One morning I rolled over and realized my prince charming had just a few hairs less than he did when we rode off into the sunset. Makes God's counting job easier I guess. Then I noticed silver hairs!! And then he turned 30!!! Whats next a cane and false teeth???

I guess I should have seen it coming when he got winded going up the stairs, or had to spend the day in bed after a baseball game. Oh and then there is his "hip flexor" he has been complaining about! What the heck is a hip flexor????

As if my husband turning 30 wasn't cruel enough of mother nature in reminding me that I might be a tad older than some people, my 6 year old started riding his bike without training wheels. It started out with a few feet and a crash and crying and threats never ever ever ever ever to get on a bike again. And then one day he took off. All of a sudden my little baby can ride a bike and I'm sobbing and realizing that he is going to get a drivers license one day!

My four year old is planning his fifth birthday party in a few weeks. This child keeps me on my toes! Last week he asked me if we could get a pet mouse. Um NO! Then he asks me if he can when I am dead. Well considering that I have an aging husband, he may get his mouse sooner than he thinks.

So I discovered something. Each child I produce gets a tad ornerier. This brings me to the Caleb update, and honestly this child leaves me speechless most days. Probably because I can't say the words that he usually evokes in front of children.

I came upon my sweet innocent angel the other day and his response to my loud "What are you doing??" was a very practical "I pump."

And then there was yesterday when I followed the trail of eyeshadow to the baby's swing. His response again was matter of fact. "Liam, eyes."

My sweet little youngest has started giggling. He discovered his hands the other day, which is always comical to me. Can you imagine the utter shock when this thing that keep hitting you in the face suddenly appears to be attached to you!! I always imagine them thinking things like , Whoa I wonder what else it can do, or what else I have!!

Yep I love being a mom!!!!!!!!!!!!

When I Grow Up

My oldest asked me once why we have to just choose one thing to be when we grow up. I feel the exact same way. Currently I am one Bio class away from entering the nursing program to become an RN. This has been my dream since I was a little girl. Only problem with nursing is needles. I hate needles. As I am studying, I have discovered another problem with nursing. All the diseases and things that can go wrong, therefore creating the need for nurses.

I have somewhat of a reputation for imaginitis, or thinking I have everything I hear about. Kevin has banned me from watching mystery diagnosis on TV because we often have conversations along these lines; Me: I think I have that! I wonder what stage I'm in! Kevin: Your in no stage. Me: Well thats the perfect stage to start treatment, seeing how your chances of surviving go down with each stage. Kevin: Your in no stage because you don't have it, plus I think you have to be a man to get it!

While Kevin was in Africa for two weeks I often fell asleep watching whatever happened to be on. One night I watched "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant". I freaked out and started cleaning all my bathroom cupboards searching frantically for a pregnancy test. True I had just had a baby and my husband was on a two week trip in Africa, but these people thought there was no earthly way they were pregnant, and they ended up on TV!!

Another thing I want to be when I grow up is a writer. I love to read and these people write hopelessly romantic books that make you get goosebumps and cause people to line up for miles three nights before the movie starts after someone turns your book into a film. But what would I write about? I can't do vampires, thats only successful once, plus Kevin tells me my "limited" knowledge of vampires is incorrect in so many aspects. I can't really do self help books, because you have to help yourself first, and I am sure a book on how to stack the most dishes in the sink with out having them fall over is not going to hit the bestsellers list anytime soon. And I haven't gotten stuck in a water barrel in another country, while researching ape behavior, almost died, seen my great grandparents, and then lived to tell about it.

Today I want to be a baby photographer when I grow up! There is this lady in like Nebraska or somewhere there is corn, and she takes these amazing pictures of naked, tiny babies and charges like a million dollars a session, but they are stunning! Lets face it newborns rock. True babies may pee on you while you are trying to capture their breath taking, red, wrinkly skin, but you don't have to cough up a dollar fifty to bribe one tiny smile out of them. They don't throw the props at you, or run away screaming "No I will NOT sit by him!" I really need to find a way to get one of those cool cameras that does everything, including making toast for you!!

So I will tell my kid, go ahead and plan on becoming a dinosaur trainer, an astronaut and a video game maker. Sounds like fun, and how could you possibly choose between those three, seriously!